I've been attending Faith Church St. Louis for a little over a month now. My mom found Pastor David on ABC 30 one night and told me about it. I would watch him online, but didn't think we would ever make the drive to St. Charles or Fenton, MO. We hopped in the car on July 6th and drove to the St. Charles Campus. The next week, my mom found herself driving to the Central Campus in Fenton and falling in love with the people there. As soon as my schedule opened up (once my shows were over), I was able to join her. I haven't missed a Sunday yet.
I must say that I've been "working on it" as Pastor David says, for the past 6 years (I was 16 years old when I asked Jesus to come into my heart). But in those 6 years, I lost my way several times and would come back to God only to find myself lost in the woods all over again. Once I began dating Nathan, and slowly closing the door on a forbidden love, I thought that God would finally give me my fairy tale life. After a year of probably one of the hardest relationships I have ever had, Nathan and I broke up officially, and we both discovered each other's acts of betrayal. And as usual, I continued to search for what it meant to be loved by an honest man. Needless to say, I have yet to find that honest love from a man on Earth...not even from my own dad. BUT, my heavenly father has shown me so much love and compassion, my heart is bursting with joy.
This past year has shown me so many new things. So many new self-discoveries: My mom is my best friend, my friends are amazing, and I can do anything that I set my mind to. God has given me a passionate heart to never give up on anything too easily. But it wasn't until May, that I completely let go of a lifestyle and a mindset that has had me by the throat for many years. Since I let go of the search for that honest man, God has planted a new seed in my heart. I no longer worry about a relationship with that honest man. I set my mind towards heaven. I ask what I can do for my fellow believers and non-believers. I ask, "Who can I bring with me to church this week?" I want others to experience this peace that I have been given. The Lord is good. Good is the Lord.
There are people who will try to take that peace from you. Do not falter. Stay strong and believe in Him. He will guide you through the fire.
Until next time...
In Peace.
1 comment:
Emily,
I just happened to stumble on your blog this afternoon. I just started blogging my writings and thoughts a couple of weeks ago. I started reading a couple of your entries and just wanted to tell you that I was really impressed with your experiences and writings. I found myself thinking how so many times our focus strays to pleasing man and not God. I too have found myself in these situtations. Sorry if you think this is weird and completely random. I just had to post something to say I completley relate to your writings. My blog is called "I Was Just Thinking..." if you want to check it out.
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